Originally posted August 30, 2009
So, what takes place in the life of a 40+ year old woman that makes her start to take a critical look at how she lives her life? For me, it was a film festival.
The Traverse City Film Festival in Traverse City, Michigan, takes place the last week of July each year. The festival is still pretty much in its infancy, as this year was only its 5th, but it is very well regarded on the film festival circuit. Documentary film maker Michael Moore is the festival director (he lives in the area) and because of his influence in film making, he is able to bring in some really great films. Some of the films have already had runs in theaters, some have only premiered/played at other festivals and some, a very few, are being premiered at the festival.
This year, I saw three documentaries, which affected me profoundly-Soundtrack for a Revolution, The Garden and No Impact Man. (http://www.soundtrackforarevolutionfilm.com/Home.html;
Soundtrack tells the story of the American Civil Rights Movement through its powerful music. I have ever seen film of young black African Americans participating in the sit ins at the lunch counters in the South, but this particular clip I don't think I had ever seen before. A young, tall and very thin black man sitting by himself at a counter and getting spit upon, slapped, punched and yelled at. At one point, he gets punched and knocked of his chair. He has egg running down his face. He looks quite disoriented. And he pulls himself back up and sits, once again, peacefully at the counter. I was awestruck. Tears were running down my face. I have never, and suspect will never, experience the level of pain, fear and bravery in my life as that young man at that one moment in time. What, then, do I really have to complain about? My life's not bad, but there are things I'd like to change. So why am I not making those changes? What is stopping me? If that young man has the courage of his convictions to get repeated beatings, why can't I make a step forward for me? What is holding me back? What is my problem?
No Impact Man tells the story of a freelance writer and his wife and young daughter who participate in year-long experiment where they try to have no impact on the planet for a year-no garbage, no wasting water, no electricity and eating food only produced within a 250-mile radius of where he lives. And you know what? He did it. Now, I can't commit to making the kind of sacrifice that he did, but I realized I can make a difference for the planet--and it's not that hard.
The Garden documents the struggle of a group of South Central Los Angeles farmers being displaced from their 14-acre urban community garden-the largest in the country. A garden they began in the aftermath of the post Rodney King LA riots. In my opinion, it is a story of injustice at the expense of minorities. Again, I was watching people struggle in a greater manner then I ever have and fighting the good fight. Standing up for what they believed in and fighting for it. Complacency was not a part of their story.
Together, these three films made me take a close and hard look at my life. And I didn't really like what I saw-I wasn't happy with some things but I wasn't doing anything about it. Life is too short to live unhappy. I realized I want the next 41 years of my life to be more substantial than the first 41. It forced me to ask myself, "What do I really want to do." And the answer, as simple and broad as it is, is to make a difference. Vauge, yes I know. But it was enough to get me moving in the right direction.
I am starting to do research into non profit companies. How they work, what they do, what can I do for them-how do my skills match up? I am not sure what will happen and when, but I know that one day I will be a part of that community. But I'm not naive, I know I can do good without working for a nonprofit-there are volunteering opportunities everywhere-especially just being 40 miles outside of Detroit-a place where so many are sacrificing and working hard to help try and bring that city back to life
On the environmental side, I have made some dramatic changes for me. My husband and I are shopping twice a week at the local farmer's market-buying fresh and local fruits, vegetables, breads, meat and dairy. I have started composting. I am reducing water usage. I bought a great book called The Green Book which gives lots of easy examples of what we can all do to make less of an impact on our planet.
I am being mindful of my actions and open to change.
These might not be huge steps-but they area steps in the right direction for me. Change isn't easy for most people, and I am no exception. But if that young man can pull himself back up on that stool at that lunch counter in the South, then there isn't much of an excuse for me not moving forward and making the best decisions for me-and if they can benefit others, then there really is no excuse for not moving forward.
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